You can now order the book in the US, and
a new, revised UK version is available here.
For more than 15 years I remained haunted by a picture I took through a New York coffee shop window of an older couple having coffee together, staring past each other and not speaking. Is this what the future held for my relationship? Or, perhaps, were they not as isolated as I originally feared. Rather, were they companionably content in their shared, quiet contemplation?
Years passed and Margaret, my partner of many years, and I grew older. From personal experience, we learned, that as women grow older, they often find it harder falling asleep. Men more frequently have difficulty staying asleep after waking early in the morning. Insomnia is a lonely place, especially if your partner is asleep and you don’t wish to disturb them. Research confirms our challenges are not unique.
Margaret and I performed tableaux of us struggling with this, together, but each in our own separate world. After staging insomnia, we collaborated to look more broadly at questions of intimacy and isolation in older couples, as well as the nature of mature relationships in our 24/7, attention-fragmented societies. Some couples grow into a deeper, more comfortable love over the course of many years; others drift apart and become bored with one another. For anyone just entering a relationship, or who wants to be in a relationship, or who has been in one for many years, these pictures explore questions of love, intimacy, and solitude. Where will our own current relationships lead? Will they endure the test of time or succumb to boredom, ennui, and isolation. How do we in Western societies, suffering a crisis of isolation and loneliness among aging populations, better support those navigating this terrain in silence?
A selection of images from the full series, below. Click on any image to open them full-sized, in a lightbox.
